tomorrow is the new year eve...

2011 just gonna pass like that...

hope tomorrow will be the wonderful day for us...

hope everything go smooth...*praying hard*...

hope the nightmare will stop by tomorrow...

hope you will really back to me...

im waiting for you...

please don't disappoint me...please...

whole night can't sleep well again...

when only i won't feel scared anymore??

when only i won't cry anymore??

i really feel so tired...i don't know what to do...

when only i will awake from the nightmare??

can this nightmare stop forever??

yesterday night i had a dream...

i dream about our baby...i dream that we have our baby...

that dream was so wonderful...having the happy family...

i know it just a dream...will never be come true...

but that dream do really make my heart feel warm...

just lost my iphone few days ago...

really feel so sad on that...

suddenly so many bad things happened to me...totally make me gonna crazy...

celebrated the christmas eve with you...

although just simple...but my heart really feel so happy...

thanks for the christmas present...i love it so much...

hope you have really come back to me and i won't lost you again...

*with love....* 

 *thanks for the christmas present...*

hope you really like the present that i gave you...

went for a short trip with hubby at 26th December...

camwhored before depart...

 khoon come along with us...

went to karak for lunch and durian...with murphy,his sifu and another 2 friends...

such a long time i didn't eat durian...cause of you...i try for it again...

last time i do really love to eat durian...but don't know why i stop it for so long...

after that all of us went to bukit tinggi...

such a long time didn't go bukit tinggi with hubby...

my heart do feel happy cause that was the place we spent our 1st christmas eve...

but my heart do feel sad cause you bring her here too...

my heart do really feel sad and pain at that time...i keep on ask myself not to think...

but my heart do really feel so pain...

walked around at there...took picture with hubby...

*hope this is the lovely you...*

reached kl at 7something...

went for dinner then reached home at 8something...

once i reached home...my heart started to feel scared...

everytime when i reached home early...my heart will feel scared...cause i don't know what you doing...

i hate this feeling so much...i really hate this so much...

when only the nightmare will go away from me??

when my life will become happy again??

i don't want all these nightmare anymore...i don't want feel scared anymore...

i don't want scared of losing you anymore...

will you really come back??will i lost you again??

p/s:sorry make you use so much of money...sorry give you so much of burden...i hope i can help you too...but this time i'm totally broke...i'm really so sorry...i will help you again once i stand up...

today is the winter solstice festival...

this year i just passed like that without you...

i still remember how we passed last year..we were having family dinner with your parents...

we were so happy and sweet that time...i miss the day so so so badly...

now i think back all these...just make my tears drop non-stop...

my heart feel so pain...just like someone cutting my heart into pieces...

you know how much i miss our happy days??